I decided to start this thread to report some of my experiences and to hopefully gain some insight and advice from others, who are more experienced than me, which at this point seems to be most people on this forum.
I have not done any magick in the past, at least not consciously or knowingly, though I did work with spirits, which is I guess what magick is all about. However, I never felt the need to perform rituals, though I’m starting to see I may have been wrong about that and I need to learn how to do this properly.
You can check my welcome thread for my background, but briefly, I’ve had a Kundalini awakening 8 years ago and gained the ability to communicate with the Spirit World, channel and heal. My life was saved by the Goddess Inanna and I have been helped by Enki and Utu. I was also approached by Azazel, but, to be honest, I got a bit scared after I ended up in the Underworld during meditation and saw his goat-headed form. It wasn’t scary per se, just very surprising. He seemed surprised too that I managed to Astral travel to his abode (this was right after my Kundalini Awakening). He claimed that his somewhat unusual appearance in the underworld (a bit like Baphomet, but without wings) was a result of curses that are placed upon him by Jewish Elders in the classic scapegoat ritual. He is the original scapegoat of course, so it makes sense. Still, I didn’t really trust him afterwards and though we had fleeting contact from time to time (and he was always patient and loving with me, even during my outbursts of petulant rage), I sort of avoided him for years.
I guess as a result of my joining this forum and being exposed to people who work with him, he came to me last night. I don’t know how it is with others, but for me, this is how contact with spirits usually goes:
- I either sense a presence or am gently touched, usually on the face, arms or shoulders.
- There may be a sensation of like a spider’s web falling on my face (this is an electromagnetic field)
- I hear a sound of static or whistling briefly, like when you tune a radio station
- This is my cue to go into a meditative state, which I usually do with one or both arms raised up.
- My Kundalini then activates, heat and pressure forms along the spine and I start convulsing (usually quite gently) from the surge of energy
- I then receive a thoughtform from the person on the other side, their name, which may appear written out in red, capital letters on a dark grey background or I may hear their name as a thoughtform spoken over and over again, until I acknowledge the message
- Thoughts then start coming to me from an outside source and I can more or less have a normal conversation with the person on the other side, though this took years to develop
So yesterday I had a very brief conversation with Azazel (BTW, am i the only one who thinks he is the same being as the Sumerian Pazuzu? I’m pretty sure that is the case, but I digress). It went something like this:
- A: So, are you finally ready to learn the Left Hand Path now?
- Me: I guess so, but I need to think about that a little bit.
- A: You had plenty of time to think it over. You need to make a decision and dedicate yourself to the path.
- M: Ok, you’re right I’m probably ready and have been preparing for this all my life. What is it that I should do.
- A: Dedicate yourself to me and I will teach you.
- Me: You do know that I am a student of Inanna, right?
- A: Her too.
Then with that, he’s gone and I am left somewhat stumped as to what he meant by that last message. Any thoughts?