Can man and woman be friends?

I suppose it depends on the degree to which you’re willing to let yourself be ruled by labels.
Labels which, when it comes right down to it are arbitrary, self-imposed, and ego-centric.

I don’t mean ego-centric as in “it strokes your ego”. I mean ego-centric as in “rooted in your sense of self, as opposed to your perception of Other”.
In magickal practice we often see energies characterised as “masculine” or “feminine”, but it’s not as if the sun and its energies, for example, are LITERALLY male, with culturally ascribed “male” characteristics. That would be ridiculous.

Gendering these concepts is a metaphor to help work it through the thick animal brain and out the other side. It’s made-up, just like any label is made up. It doesn’t matter whether we’re applying that label to vague notional concepts, or real celestial bodies, or our sense of self. The Self is made up.

Those labels only exist as tools to serve us in our aim to transcend the need for them.
So, what is a man or woman? What is a friendship?
ARE you capable of engaging in an equal exchange of energy with something you define as “Other”?
Are you being served by that perception?

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I see women as a different culture. And dealing with another culture can be difficult.

I’ve heard women say they periodically get more attention than they really need from men, so they’re scared when a strange man approaches them. Personally, as a man, I don’t know how else to deal with this problem than just keeping my distance and limiting my interactions to a minimum. Even though, I hear many men say they deal with the opposite problem. 2 different experiences. 2 different perspectives. 2 different problems. I don’t see a foreseeable solution as of yet.

Try to interact with them on an energy level rather than physically, you are an excellent practitioner, so you knew very well about it. Try that way and see what you perceive, wish you good luck!

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Yeah thats definitely something ive felt, and i feel like its gotten worse in recent years. The solution for me has been to travel to countries where a certain ideology hasn’t fully taken hold of the populace. Women definitely aren’t the same everywhere, and each country will have its own cultural idiosyncrasies which will make interactions with women either better or worse.

To answer the OPs question though, yes I do believe men and women can be friends. One thing I do value from female friendships is that you have more permission to be emotionally vulnerable with female friends, because they are more socially conditioned to expressing such emotions than men are. I mean, even wanting to hug a male friend can sometimes be socially faux pas. In this regard, I do think men have things to learn from female friendships.


This is a complex issue. All I can say is from the very first moment you have to make clear your intentions. That you just want to be friends with her and act like it. Women are wary of men always trying to be “friends” just to try to get into their panties.

Yes, a man and a woman can be friends. It happens all the time. If you look at the word “girlfriend” you see the word “friend”. This should give you a clue about how such a relationship starts. Many married couples start out as friends.

My point is to set up clear, definite boundaries. You want to be friends without any sexual, or romantic intentions.