Here I will be posting the recordings of my dreams for the past three months and ones hereafter. My goal is to better recall them in order to compare symbolism related to my waking life.
After recall is sufficient then I will slowly introduce lucid dreaming into my regular schedule, and then hopefully the practice of astral projection. We shall see.
Month One •◇• October of 2020
A good few days that are posted without a dream incident are more often influenced by environmental stimuli (some of which reluctantly state aren’t exactly health conscious decisions ). This would be another goal to prevent
10/1
Inside a video game (halo like) and nearly dying. Chased by spiders and zombies (some flood). Then in house where I’m shown animations list of videos. Lizards acting like cats licking the floor and running from me. Helping someone calm down with the dark winter music
10/2 Evocation Night
Buying something and not receiving what I asked but then receiving what I ask (convenience store). Not able to find the clothes I want for work and panicking. Walking to work and it’s raining heavily. While at work my shoes are wet and I struggle to serve. Am given dry socks but customers are being extra.
10/3 Stress dream of work and school combined. I took the customer’s order and wrote it down as math equations
10/4 Traversing an extremely dark tunnel and fighting something. Mansionlike with various different rooms. I come in and out through different door levels that open to the outside. As I move deeper into the cave I move up in the physical/outside plane. I’m asked to come out of the cave on each level by my “producer.” I come out and head to a restaurant (dunkin supposedly). The first and third food item is extremely expensive. My mother belittles me, denies it, and I snap. I storm out of my house/restaurant. (I was in both simultaneously)
10/5 Crying in the beginning but why I’m not sure. In a mansion again but I could see. I was being held against my will and using the multiple doorways to escape their site. Found a blonde girl on the way and became borderline intimate with her. We decided to continue to escape. Was looking through the cracks of doors to avoid our opponents and a shadow figure with bright white eyes was stalking. She knew where I was regardless. Her and I went through a window onto the semi/porch roof and jumped down safely by grabbing the cushion/curtain underneath. We ran with heavy packs on our back and crossed two main roads. She made it across as I lagged behind, struggling to not get hit.
10/6 Shot a white bird with an arrow. I go to find more birds but can’t. Three whales gone hunting.
10/7 Can’t Remember
10/8 Finding people choice cuts of meat and choosing sizes of pool cues
10/9 Dream I was painting school floor until I come across a strange dog that lost an eye. Dog tries to attack and I flee to my grandfather’s house and lock myself in.
10/10 Don’t recall much of the dream but possibly that I was weeping? Guy handing me money and apologizing for being an ass
10/11 Walking up a nature trail to a house that deals with some sort of clay. I had scooped some clay from dirt before entering. People were kinda rude and then there were the best skiers in the world. Whale, elephants, and some other (rhino most likely) large animal bones rested on the floor of the boat. I went to a village after. There was a homeless man outside and I entered the shop of my liking so I could buy food for myself and him. I was stuck there crying as she was speaking to me calmly. Cant remember what she said but it may be associated with some internal issues of mine. I recall having difficulty controlling myself around the sweets that she made
10/12 weird intimacy with one of my brothers while we play video games and I’m mad uncomfortablyduring the entirety of it and go to leave. I end up in this place with two hills, a river, and a bridge. Three men offer me a different sword. The sword of one with a name I cant remember, of darkness,and the last of death. I take the sword of death and I’m told I can bamboozle the first swordsman with it but I dont. (I spoke with them two different times and the last swordsmaster was nowhere to be found.) A ritual is done to the sword (everything and the sword is food at first and donned with the hottest spices) and I bite the tip of the sword. It becomes a large silver great sword and the original wielder appears in the distance and starts following me. Hes an older man with pale white skin and a black cloak. I can see his face and head, he is bald. I turn to flee and as he gets closer I swing at him and miss. He then retaliates with his smaller gold sword and I block then turn to flee again. As I flee someone else appears with me (possibly glenn for possible reassurance?) and we run together until we are stopped behind a tree. The wielder still pursued but stopped a ways from where we were and sat with me. I was afraid but he never attacked. Now I’m back at my work taking orders when our customers wish yo redeem points through other businesses on our app (imaginary) so I concede. We dont have the specific restaurants they’re looking for. One group is understand and the other is as well besides one. They take care to care for me despite this. I leave and I’m now in my backyard facing some cats here and there. I get into a scuffle with one or two of them (black, white, and grey) and they barely fight back besides a hiss and a scratch or two. In the distance a much larger blonde female Maine coon appears and she watches this take place wearily/intensely.
10/13 Possible humiliation. Crying involved and another male. Cant recall the rest
10/14 Driving people home and not getting lost. While I’m home I’m chased around bu a huge centipede. The centipede bit a snake and peeled a long strip of skin off. Sleeping cats. Serving customers. Then being on the road but on foot. I spy on the shape creatures with me until I’m walking home again. I come across a rat and flee. It’s hot on my heels so I climb a tall fence against the side of a building. There are a ton of rats at the top, so with one behind me, the others start to jump off at me. I push off the fence and flip “backwards” off the gate while a torrent of fire follows the rats.
10/15 Serving two picky customers. They wanted jolly ranchers but one wanted one much sweeter with extra grenadine. Trimming my hair???
10/16 serving? Fish beads. Being driven to work and forgetting makeup. I was then given makeup
10/17 ???boys?
10/18 Waitressing again and kind of going with the flow. People were patient. Then I was swimming across a shallow, naturally occurring pool sided by concrete bridge. I climbed out and almost took the stairwell but was call back. I saw a heavily pregnant woman. [Possible lucid dreaming control: I had my class on while I was “sleeping” and at some point saw my room and laptop screen vividly as the teacher was speaking. I thought my eyes were open and they felt so but I soon realized that they were closed]
10/19 something about disease
10/20 cannot recall
10/21 ???
10/22 Counting money
10/23 Glenn gives me food without fries so I order some and get in trouble.
10/24 Barely slept
10/25 Cat reaching out to me?
10/26 once again in a shop and going after the junk food, especially the cookies. The cashier is rude this time around. Before that I was walking up a small hill with a broken concrete bridge for cars to pass over while the sidewalk was completely separate
10/27 Throwing apples at my manager and shoplifting. I stole two royal blue nail polish but forgot the chocolate bunny
10/28 Serving again but I was assertive and things seemed easier. Painful lip?
10/29 Dream friend was told she was drinking too much but that was intended for me to hear. Alot of people there with me. I heard or read the name Leviathan.
10/30 A tab stapled with a one hundred dollar bill
10/31 ???
Month Two •◇• November of 2020
My dreams are a bit more vivid than the first month. I’ve recalled significantly more than the first and most of the symbolism is congruent and what I felt was easy to understand with my waking life.
11/1 Sketching a bird? I was very passionate about it.
11/2 Three bird drawings. All of which had blue, yellow, and green coloration. One corner of one was ripped, the other almost entirely cut in half diagonally, and the last was in good condition. Katie scratched the growth on her neck and is bleeding profusely.
11/3 Dream of buying a bunch of food with a guy next to me. (Especially candy but I couldn’t find a three musketeers). He was worried about the amount of the bill but I stated I’d be paying for my own. [Possible financial worries due to impulse buys]
11/4 around the neighborhood with some dude. (His face changed throughout) he was flirty and at some point became borderline sexual. My pants were ripped. We were on a bike at some point. I sat on his lap and hurt his balls lol. I end up at an Ex Coworkers place and her and I greet each other warmly. She fed me lots of snacks.
11/5 ???
11/6 ???
11/7 Bees in my hair
11/8
11/9
11/10 Brought along by love interests best friend somewhere and announced to all about how hideous I was. He was hurting but that didnt give him the right to lash out.
11/12 Roaming around a resort/hotel in a truck. Not finding my way exactly and my father is upset. We go to travel to the jungle of the area on this rollercoaster ramp road. I’m nervous about falling during the twists but we’re fine. We end up at my ex coworkers, Allies’, place then head back. There are two horses running and playing near/in water. They look like the horses from Spirit. The Male drinks from the ocean and spits it out. (This may be the point where I use the Dragon tongue). I try and struggle to find my way back to Allies place. I sleep over and DJ is with me. we share boneless wings between us. There are many other males there and two of which start to double team rape me. I fight back and they dont seem bothered after the fact. I start attacking them in public with increasing wrath. I wake up. At some point in the dream one dude burned one of my teeth and another was wiggly. My teeth were a little crooked
11/13 Traveling? There was a man willing to catch me so I didn’t fall into the rotting food but joked he would drop me. Responded to me going to the void by saying once you open that wallet, all they want to do is take
11/14
11/15 If you don’t want bad water, filter it. Also anger with someone and a wound on my vagina
11/16 Slept in segments. Dream consisted of me going off on Darren for speaking to Glenn poorly. My customers closed their tab with me and berated me for not having their orders properly separated.
11/17 more difficulty with customers being disrespectful
11/18 Cuddling with the man and being close in general. He was on top of me holding me closely. I rarely saw his face, body more. Uncomfortable being wholly intimate with him. Odd part of the dream where I had large flaps of connective tissues on my vagina as if I were getting ready for a massive breeding then laying process.
11/19 Something about a bear
11/20 in a mansion as cat people. Two stairwells leading to the void. We couldn’t escape and all put to sleep one by one after staring into the void. Our golden chips on a panel disappeared one by one and we each went unconscious. We were then taken to a massive white ball in the void to be erased. As we neared we were incinerated. I then wake to another dream of chasing a bull in the middle of nowhere on a farm
11/25 swimming in the Nile of africa. Wildebeest. There were crocodiles and I avoided them. Then came robed people in yellow. They took me away to somewhere underground but not through the water. I was in a bunker or somewhere. Still sunlight. Everything was cluttered. I helped a child to calm down and untangle a wire. Ms deb made me cupcakes and I was called racist afterwards. Idk why. I kept my composure
11/26
11/27 three sentient laundry machines lined up next to each other. One starts to leak liquid caramel?
11/28 Dream of applying something to a pool of water everyone was in. Unbeknownst to me, it was a bio melting substance, and took everyone underwater to be dissolved. Went to the “infernal empire” to find solutions. Avoiding people I knew. Robin at the end of dream.
11/29 I recall the end of the dream of me holding a worried little boy.
11/30 I was at work and busy. Fallon took a table while I ate. I’m at home and my mother upsets me so I leave. I go to a party in my bros car but have to stop and wait along the way at an elevator with signs around. People without vehicles are understanding of my impatience and I leave. I go to the party and it’s a massive arcade and I’m tempted by all the food especially the cookies. I eventually eat two macadamia nut cookies and initiate conversation with owner of cookies. He’s friendly and we chat while he holds me first some reason until I leave. DJ comes along and we go outside with I think the little boy from my previous night. He holds my hand on the path while until we walk along some broken up hills with metal fences and a river running through a narrow gap. On the narrow path I cling tightly to the child’s hand as we continue and keep him from falling. DJ leaps over to the other hillside no problem but I remain cautious. I cling tightly to the metal fences and bars now to reach the other side. Someone else falls in the water but it wasnt the child with me. I dont recall the transition but I find myself falling into a dark pit. There’s a dim light with me as I make my way down the pit. At some point I think I or someone else crawled out but then we were back in the pit and my “companion” turned into a spider I think and skittered up out of the well. Some odd shadow creatures take notice but they dont find us. They are rat like and wear fine suits. A circle of library bookshelves surround me. There are two entrances. As the creatures leave, one spots a rack of spears and is immediately intrigued. As he nears he turns around and speaks passed an entrance and spots me. He becomes a nuisance at this point and blows out the candle whilst giggling. I can hear DJ shouting with concern in his voice to get me out of there. (I think).
Month Three •◇• December of 2020
Dreams seem a bit shorter and I experienced alot of stress during this month.
12/1 arguing with someone in the beginning but cant recall. I’m at home and serving tables some how. One regular seems to be mentally diminished over age. I’ve run off along a river bank at some point. I pass a shed, yetis, and avoid possible crocodiles while near the water. Strange purple blob creatures come after me. I find an obsidian box in Pentagon shape with a salt lid. The river goes out into the ocean. I come back and kill a fish. I hit a purple whale and she’s angry. I avoid her at the dock with the two boats set up side by side and then return to my kitchen table. An ex coworker, Steve, plays cards with one or two others. My regular at this point is incapable of ordering a burger due to his deterioration. Steve has three boxes from the sea including the one I had originally found. I tried to ask for it and maybe was my answer. I had originally forgotten I had found it during this part of the dream and became angered I couldn’t claim it now. We played gofish and dreams ends here.
12/2 cant recall much besides possibly working or being in an office job. Little blond boy was with me again.
12/3
12/4
12/5 in a chocolate shop with Glenn and cant decide on what I want. People make it a point to get in my way and I remain as polite as possible. I keep losing the chocolate section and it disappears at some points. I become frantic searching for it and am told I don’t need it. I disregard this and continue to look for a while. We decide to leave and head into another shop. It’s a perfume shop. We sniff a couple and then leave. We’re now outside and it’s night. The stars are gorgeous. We continue and the stars start to fade and I’m trying to take a picture of a cat head cloud formation. A man is turning on Christmas lights and it is blocking out the stars. I’m angry as I can’t catch the photo and we leave and exclaim “goddamn” in front of DJ. Unable to catch myself I fell silent and left. I’m now elsewhere I dont recognize. Someplace indoors with a patio? My regular, Darryl, is competing against something. He pays for my food. I state that if he wins I’ll take care of his bill. He wins and flees the scene. I too leave.
12/6 dream of being handed a one hundred dollar bill. Having intercourse with people who are supposed to be my coworkers. Some rejected and one tries a second round with me.
12/7 I was on a boat and it started falling apart. Soon a crocodile attempted to board it but the boat fell apart completely. I was lying on a large plank of wood. The crocodile jumped on and joined me. He didnt try to bite me and turned his back.
12/8 DJ driving a car with me in the passenger seat. Trapped in an apartment with a couple who wouldn’t let me leave.
12/9 Sexy time with DJ. Lead to an apartment with DJ. It’s “Joe’s and allison’s.” They didnt have the same faces. I’m then in another apartment complex but larger. The couple was putting on a show while Emily was serving the area. Bullying from the couple commenced and I’m immediately incensed. It continues until they’re ready for live recording. As they begin, I stand up with my coffee, and fling it in their faces for all to see. Everyone is speechless and I leave. I’m then with a group I was with before. I greet the leader and he reciprocates. He then proceeds to walk down the line of apartments. He starts dragging out the members and murdering them in front of their children. I think they’re all mothers that he kills. I can’t recall if he kills any children too. I became extremely protective of the children and screaming and crying and howling for him to stop. He doesn’t stop.
12/10 Purple suit. Freaked out finding a dying hummingbird. I watched it to see if was still alive. It was but barely. I picked it up and fed it with a dropper. It slowly regained health.
12/11 ???
12/12 A large man requested sex in exchange for money. I accepted. I was in a home in the woods. At first I was with this other boy attempting sex. We did the deed and he made the mistake of not using protection. I freaked out when he finished and rushed to have all semen removed to prevent pregnancy. I come across a group of people with Glenn and we spend time in the girls apartment. It’s decorated with some purple furnishings. I knock over a board of hers and try to fix it. She takes it as a great deal and we leave. At the edge of the woods. I had to move silently to refrain from being caught by whatever void beast inhabited the space. I’ve had this dream before. I wasn’t caught and once I made it to the other side I had access to the woods without harm. The large man I previously encountered requested sex once again in exchange for money and shelter. I declined and fought my way out of the apartment were now in.
12/13 I’m in my neighborhood wandering. Lost? I avoid someone trying to kidnap me. The neighbors hate us for some reason. There are a bunch of antiques we have that they want. They can’t have them. I’m often moving in and out of the house through the window. Our home seems more decrepit and unkempt. Older and has a Victorian era mansion style to it. Someone (sebastian/gage?) tries to lay with me but reveals a pedophile side to him. I shove him off and leave.
12/14 Having sex with Toby the regular. Disgusting first of all. Feeling insecure and disgusted with the entire thing.
12/15 Two chains. Braided. Silver interior and gold exterior. I’m comparing mine with another.
12/16
12/17 I was in a school. Math class. Teacher Ms. Holly with black hair and a red dress. I leave the classroom and get let but find my way back. I’m in my room. Katie is a kitten with folded ear tips. I smuggle her in. The room is messy and I start organizing. Katie pees in a corner and I reprimand her. A girl is in my room and she opens something. It’s a makeup kit and I tell her to stay out of things she doesnt belong in.
12/18 Man yelling at me for lending money
12/19 Cant recall but DJ was there
12/20 Ginger man that turned into a red and purple dragon with a beige belly attempted to seduce me. Dream skips and I’m serving a table who barely speaks English
12/21 DJ and I going all the way. Most of the dream not recalled but was definitely eventful
12/22
12/23 Bear. Fish in a self sustaining ecosystem jar. I was at one point a common potoo bird that hides in plain sight.
12/24 Being taught mathematics?? Red book with golden letters called Twins.
12/25 in a relationship with a girl and kissing another girl to make her jealous. Being looked at and stalked while taking a shower. After this people kept coming towards me. My hair in the mirror was especially curly and lots of volume. Large crater like zit on vagina. Allyson and I decide to cook together.
12/26 ???
12/27 Cant recall
12/28
12/29 Somewhere in the beginning i flee from something. I find a secret room along my path and enter. Once there there’s an orb similar to that of meridias beacon but smaller, geometric, and silver. I touch it and a boy appears to explain the use of the room. He becomes offended somehow and a towering black fur “coated” figured figure with a goat/deer skull mounted on a huge white goat. I flee to the other end of the room with another smaller room through a carpet of violet flame. I’m worried of burning but didnt. I turn around and now I am the white goat. I charge the creature and cast violet flame back. He flails back a bit before the dream changes.
12/30 I find myself at this resort for exercising and battle training. All involved are nearly or completely naked. A tall black woman, the leader, looks at me knowingly/sadly? I turn to go down the path. I’m trying to find my way home. The path is paralleled by a cold water lake and trees too close to the path. I take caution to not fall in. I’m afraid of falling in. Realizing it isnt the way home, I turn back, and enter the building. I speak with a girl and she doesnt seem concerned.
I am now in a field. I’m with two others seeking shelter from some unknown creatures. Possibly zombies? We find a cabin with a door that doesnt work. They dont move to do anything so I rip it off its hinges and try to fit a new door that I found onto it. Theres a yellow snake outside and I gut it.
Now I’m in an underwater cabin. Here I’m breeding balloons that turn into rabbits and cats. I’m giving them something that causes rapid growth and breeding desire. One of the cats I outside in the airtight porch passes away. I wash the cats bowls
12/31 All I recall is having to enter a gorilla enclosure. I was afraid that the single male would be aggressive towards me. We made eye contact and his eyes spoke of longing?