Benefits of a relationship, sexual or otherwise

If you’re middle aged, and have a few issues, is it in your best interest? And if the person has E.D., is that a dealbreaker? What is the end result of having a relationship, the point of it?


Sex for celebrations of Sabbath. Like Ostara was actually celebrated with orgies. You can use it to charge sigils too.


Only you can really answer that.

But I would say “having issues” is not a very attractive quality in a partner. Being aware of issues and actively working to fix them is one thing, but just being aware and doing nothing to fix it is not desirable IMO. Even if it is desirable to someone else, it’s likely they’re a people-pleaser with their own issues looking for a co-dependent relationship and a fixer-upper.

Relationships aren’t about two half-people making up for each other’s failings, they’re about two whole people coming together as a new entity.

Never been with someone with EDD. I don’t think it’s a dealbreaker unless, again, the person in question is aware of it but not actively working on some kind of solution.

Companionship. Camaraderie. Support. Physical affection.

There’s no end goal here. Relationships take work. Not all the time, but a good deal of the time.


There are as many answers to that as there are people who want relationships.

Could be, could also be your worst nightmare, it depends on your partner and the dynamic between you.

There are people who want company and companionship to share life with, but do not want sex, for thier own reasons. Sometimes it’s because they were molested and have PTSD, some are asexual, some have hormone issues and no libido. They can all still love romantically and want a relationship too.


Companionship and the chance to feel trust and love and affection. To feel and give safety from the madding crowd. To share ideas and see what they sound like in that trusting environment. To help and allow that someone to help you. To feel and give comfort.

If you have these things then the sexual side is secondary and if sex does occur then it happens with a loving understanding.


If you do kegels the “problems” will be that so much blood flows through your penis it gets hard with very little stimulation. To quote the person I picked this up from, it would be annoying if it weren’t so awesome.

Imagine two triangles on your pelvic floor region, one pointing forward or up and the other pointing back or down, depending on if you are upright or lying down. The triangles help to visualize the muscles and build the mind-body connection.

I do three sessions at most, depending on how the muscle feels, morning, after exercise, and before bed. There are two ways to do it - I alternate. You can do long holds or rapid pulses. I’ll contract or pull in the tips of the triangles and hold for around ten seconds (if you have mega swole pelvic floor muscles you can do longer probably, just don’t strain yourself), then push the tips down/away and hold for around ten seconds. The other way is to squeeze one direction, then the other, rapidly alternating back and forth around ten times.

Not only does this improve blood flow, it makes you cum your face off, so that’s nice. Apparently it also lets you have infinite stamina unless you are just going absurdly fast and lets you cum on command when you figure it out and build the muscle strength. That’s why you should do these most every day unless you notice fatigue and need to rest.

As for why to have a loving/sexual relationship with someone, it produces positive emotion and reduces negative emotion. It creates support and trust. Sex magick opened me to the possibility of truly, genuinely feeling and believing that someone else is equal to me and the possibility of having a relationship without fear. With most people, I just manipulate their brains out as my default. Most people are too clueless for me to want to do anything else. It’s really hard to not feel better than someone when you can play them like a fiddle without even thinking about it or scheming in your journal about it, especially when they try to block you or aggress on you, however feeble their attempt may be. Just to be clear, by “block” I mean get in your way. If one of these buffoons blocked my communications with them I’d probably be relieved that there are now less animatronics in my life. Not viewing someone like that, because of the reality of the situation and not self-deception, is a big fuckin deal.


Look, buddy, nobody is special. A relationship is what people makes out of it. It can be a very pleasant experience or it can be fucking hell, but it is what people agree, implicitly, to make it.

I was making some plans, sometime ago. I had to go… will, let’s just say too far away, and there was someone waiting for me. And I told her, okay, I’ll be seeing you but I’ll be beyond tired, I don’t know if I’ll get an erection. And she said: you still have hands and tongue and you can sleep twenty hours straight later.

So, from what women have told me NOT to make me feel better (best option would have been just to let me sleep twenty hours straight fist), no, is not a dealbreaker. I’m quite sure most people on Earth would understand. I also think you’ve been told the truth as it is: having defects is okay, having issues is okay as long as you want to fix them. If you’re comfortable in your own misery nobody is going to take you because why in hell would they do that?! To be miserable?

Simple truth is, nobody is a total loner. So yes, relationships are in your best interest.


Outside the mystical, there are enough pills out there to give ya a rager, so ED should be a nonconcern. As for a relationship, it’s up to you really what type you’d like to cultivate. friends with bens are usually amazeballs, and if you want more, there are millions out there also looking, especially now lol. Good luck to ya! You can doooooiiiiiit!!!


pelvic thrusts, leg lifts, and planks are also good to increase blood flow and strengthen your core


I am stating my views and my views only and this in no way applies to anyone but myself. You may take what resonates and disard the rest.

A relationship is very subjective. A lot of people look for relationships for the companionship, the physical aspect and stability (emotional and financial, two incomes). But everyone is different. We are all indoctrinated by society that a relationship/marriage/family is the ultimate goal and this is always a part of our subconscious. However this is far from the truth. And I honestly feel this is a flawed template.

This doesn’t mean that I’m not in favour of relationships. If they make you happy, then absolutely go for it. Do what makes YOU happy. Fuck what I’m saying.

Honestly over the past few years I’ve realised that all I need is myself. And this not some toxic positivity stuff that goes around. I’ve learnt to find happiness in solitude and happiness in doing things I like to do. Now I do have a family and I do love them a lot. But I realise that I have all that based on what society has taught me and not what was right for me. However it is what it is.

Depends on what the issues are. Like @Veil rightly said, it’s important the person works through them.

For some yes and for some no. Depends on the other person. As long as you’re upfront, many men/women will respect this fact. Like @mulberry already said a lot of people are looking for companionship. There is absolutely no reason to doubt yourself due to this.

I’m no expert and I will not say more except the fact that ED many times is due to a lot of mental factors as well. Maybe work on the issues and the condition may go away. Just a thought.

See the first paragraph. According to me, there isn’t a point. It makes many happy, that’s is THEIR choice and right for them, for many it causes stress and bondage and this is THEIR choice and right for them. You do you and do what makes YOU happy. No one can tell you the end result of a relationship, because it’s different for everyone. This is very subjective.

I wish you luck and hope you find what makes you happy.


Okie dokie … Thanks for the responses all.
I guess given the content if responses I will look into the romance and sex demons and angels.


ED is gonna be caused by diet (high cholesterol) mentally (due to stress, performance anxiety) and lack of blood flow (proper exercise, diet, and cardiovascular healthy stress).

So make sure you get in the gym, clean up your diet, and exercise regularly.

A green smoothie in the morning goes a long way, you can get a couple serving of fruit and veggies in one meal.

If you have a good body and discipline you’re also on the road to attracting the right partner.

Make sure you get to the money, woman (especially older woman) like men with established success and resources. In nature the female bird won’t mate with a male unless he already has a nest set up.

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The end result… I guess that’s all up to you and what you’re looking for.

In my own opinion it is finding someone to love and to love you at your best and worst. It’s going through trials and hard times together. Knowing someone is always on your team even when the whole world is against you. Having a best friend and a lover.

This takes work. It takes heartbreak and all that shit no one likes but I think in the end once found it’s a blessing :heartbeat:

I don’t think having ED is a dealbreaker. Especially when there’s many options to help with this! Medications, natural things to help. Something to look into.

Anyways, all the best✨


We all have issues. Guess part of it is working around them, being a positive influence, forgiveness and an unmentioned trait but just focusing on your love for the person above all else and it will dissolve the negativity.

I also need to practice what I preach right here

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Humans aren’t intended I don’t think to be alone. We’re social creatures. The benefits of having a relationship are companionship, support, caring, friendship.

If it’s a romantic friendship then the sex is an added bonus.

I don’t see the drawbacks really unless you get involved with a narcissist.

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It has just seemed like a mass onslaught of imposter spirits/unintended actors playing psychological warfare to keep me from getting with someone, or it would simply be Murphys Law continually.
So it played with my head a lot.

In hindsight, Ive wondered what if I had nailed each imposter lol.

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Fuego I don’t think any malicious spirits are holding you back from having a satisfying relationship. I think you don’t feel your in a good spot to meet someone new and probably don’t have much confidence in yourself.

You have to work on you bro. Get yourself a stable job, your own place to live, a car, you’ll meet people who are right for you along the way.

Let me give you an example. Instead of doing a love spell I did a working with Sartmulu ( martian spirit) to help me lose weight. Once I did that finding a gf was easy.


Right on, thanks :). I guess the upside is I funnel all this energy into art and magic instead. Maybe love magic between alpha males and the least physically desirable women. Just kidding, not malicious like that.

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Speaking of which, Im going to go paint my wand … excuse me.

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@Fuego What colors?

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