so the weirdest thing ever…
belial and i don’t have a great history, it’s personal so i won’t put any details but what i can tell you is that it wasn’t great at all and it was my fault, he didn’t do anything wrong at all. this was about 3 to 4 years ago.
now today when i was taking a shower i was getting interested in belial, it gave me a lot of anxiety because i have been thinking of apologizing to him for my bad behaviour in the past but i havent done so yet, i wasn’t even sure if he’d show up.
after the shower i started to read about him on this forum, peoples experiences with him, what to expect, his personality yeah you name it and to make it even more weird i feel even more interested to work with him. i have NEVER been interested like this, to make it even more ironic, i had these thoughts it’s funny if i start working with him in the future and guess what, im thinking of it but still it’s weird. is it me being interested or can it be his influence for my interest? because i’m about 90% interested so far.
why not 100? well mostly because of how anxious i am due to our past AND i’m addicted to nicotine and i don’t wanna quit, perfect sacrifice yeah? well no i don’t wanna quit at all and is it really a must? wtf should i do… is it him calling me or is it just me being interested? bruh imagine me calling him and he slapping me so hard that i fall into a coma