So the feeling of Beleth is interesting. I have often heard it is very scary. I have not yet seen this yet. I have asked Beleth to see the scary side, but Beleth said I would advise not to right now. And so I am fine with the more pleasant side. I have also heard someone say it felt tingly, I did get a bit of that. seeing that Beleth is somewhat of a seducer I was still a bit surprise at what I found for Beleth’s energy. I found it very soft and sweet. I feels like candy or ketimine (which I haven’t done in forever (though the experience makes me wish I could give it as an offering-lol)) I have found it can get arousing but I haven’t seen too much of that as of yet, but look forward to it. To the extent that it is dark it feel like maybe? almost like a creepy clown dark? Not like it but something more funky like Harley Quinn from Batman or perhaps even more like ‘Sweet Tooth’ from Twisted Metal. Though this energy seems light, fun and almost silly like I want to point to this description that I have found…
To this I would say it feels healing and nurturing, I’m not a big fan of saying it felt ‘matronly’ as I am wanting to get into work that is largely of a sexual nature. On the ‘throwing you into a fire’ I have felt a sense that I should be humble for Beleth, a sense that I should respect the royalty that is Beleth. Perhaps this was also a combination of what I heard kicking in and my experience with Belial. I found with him he doesn’t seem like he cares as much about his king status, I think Belial liked to care about it but also be a cool guy that was above it, but I think we both got a bit carried away and pushed eachother to almost near breaking points at times so I am trying be a bit more careful especially when I work with the kings, and I am sort of thinking of evoking all of them so yeah. Beleth and Dantalion are telling me to slow down a bit though and that they will try to help me prepare for that which is good cause I am also a bit nervous about some of them.
Anyways the first night I ended up offering both Dantalion and Beleth carrots. It was late and Dantalion was in a hurry just to get things going. Neither seemed to care too much that night about the offering, but I figured I would give Beleth the same offering as it was late and it was more convenient at the time.
That was the day I fell a sleep talking to Beleth. The next day I bought a bunch of Candy to offer Beleth. I don’t know is this a good offering? I imagined the spirits I ask for help with love, lust and seduction that candy seems fitting, perhaps especially to Beleth and Sallos, not too sure why, just the prefeeling I get from the names themselves. Plus I heard a couple of people say they offer apples. I think this is from the demons of Magick, where Gordon Winterfoot offers an apple that he eats to the demons, this seems strange but I think the idea is that they experience it through him, still a bit odd from how I used to understand things but like the a little bit more relaxed approach.
I gave a percentage of my candy to Beleth on the sigil as I lit incense smoke and candles and ate my share. Added Candy to my drink hoping Beleth could experience some of my drink this way. Beleth seemed mostly very happy with my offering minus a short out burst I seemed to hear to the contrary.
I’m not sure if I am just going nuts or… I think Beleth said I have some negative thought forms around me, or maybe Beleth is a bit split personalities. I spoke with Beleth today and was going back and forth between male and female?
I hate to say it but I am still a bit new in some of these things, feel free to jump in and help me understand haha.
Anyways I am working on getting a love interest back in my life, but brace yourself cause this is kind of really confusing. The love interest is the occultist that I am fighting with. We stopped talking talking and we keep in touch through telepathy, telepathic sort of like reiki energy cuddles and fighting with magick.
We almost got back together this summer, we were really hitting it off telepathically, he told me he loved me, I was a bit shocked and didn’t know what to say, suddenly it was a bit much that this was all in my head. How do I know I’m not crazy I thought? How do I know it’s not a demon or someone else on the line? One day he said to meet him at a swimming pool and he wasn’t there but I ended up meeting someone with the same name who seemed to be the same guy I was talking to that day. But then again another time he said don’t go trying to find him at his work one day, and next thing I looked into his aura in my third eye and less than an hour later I ran into him at his work. I said I would text him later, and later that night he put his patented -almost predictable - insomnia spell on me.
So it’s not always him but duh! It is often him.
Anyways I’m not doing a normal and half fast love spell. If I was to send him demons you’d better believe he’d send them back to me. He had demons attacking me for months from just joking about it in an email.
It’s good anyways because that is not the way to really get him or anyone back really the way you want them anyways. I am trying to asses why things haven’t worked and do demonic self improvement as part of a much larger process of things that I am doing. I am wanting to build a stronger foundation to bring him back to, rather than just bringing him back to the same things that made things not work out in the first place.
I am interested in working with Beleth, Sallos, Sitri, Gremori and Dantalion for an energetic make over to create a stronger aura of lust as well as seduction plans so there is still some fun spiceyness that sparks the same sort of retarded excitement that love spells evoke in people for me. Plus there is a constant element of danger which is super scary and fun and awesome.
This journal is more about my workings with Beleth so if anyone would like to know more about that specifically, let me know.
Anyways I also want to mention two things. Going for walks I have felt Beleth recently nudging me to walk different, so far it is more of an upstraight shoulders back confidence thing rather than a sassy seductive sexy sort of thing, but perhaps it is the royal personification of confidence he is trying to invoke into me as a template for Sitri to later sass up. lol
Oh I have found that this other demon is leaving me alone now that I am writing this.
Anyways I got to go do a few more rituals before the clock hits midnight. Let me know.