Being bullied, revenge, nowhere to run

I’m a mid-range experienced occultist. I began heavy practice around a decade ago.

to cut short, the last two years, I’ve faced unavoidable situations in social situations and work relationships where people lash out at me, mock me, make fun of me, gossip about me, undermine my self esteem. I’m recovering from being in a longterm relationship with a borderline woman who emotionally abused me, grinding me down to nothing.

during the last two years of these events, i have a list of everyone during our divorce who turned their back on me and left me for dead after the relationship ended.

on that list is also everyone that has crossed me and further helped to make me question my own self worth and make me feel worthless.

i have fought, reasoned for a long time whether or not working magick against these people would be a good decision. i have worked with magick before for revenge and it did successfully even the playing field with previous bullies. a part of me just feels like all this damage being dealt to me is payback for the curse i threw at someone, which got really serious for the target (he deserves it)

so i have backed off.

but i am HURTING. deep down, i am wounded, and these people have “given” me beliefs and energies in myself which make me feel crippled, weak, worthless and stupid.

when i turn to BALG, alot of people say to move on and not to use magick, but i am seriously considering it, because i feel like it would make me feel empowered again, and even. and it would help to get rid of my feelings.

It seems that you have thought it over for a while and have probably weighed all the pros and cons, so if you truly believe that cursing these people will make you feel empowered and help you to feel less of those feelings, then by all means curse them! I would advise against it only if you are going to find yourself thinking that once they get what they deserve, it is somehow backfiring on you as you are suggesting here: [quote=“Wahnfried, post:1, topic:189342”]
i have worked with magick before for revenge and it did successfully even the playing field with previous bullies. a part of me just feels like all this damage being dealt to me is payback for the curse i threw at someone, which got really serious for the target (he deserves it)
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I don’t believe in payback, especially when the curse/hex is justified. Sounds more like return to sender on their part. And they may or may not even realize they are doing it. Just make sure your shielded and protected against return on your part.

Kind of a “Im rubber your glue”… Silly as it may sound, it does work.

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This is almost word for word was I was going to originally reply. I don’t believe that curses backfire either, especially when justified. I also considered mentioning that it could be a return to sender, but I mostly think that what Wahnfried is feeling is his tormentors’ toxicity in general. It’s burrowed under the skin and left longstanding scars.

I think, borrowing from Blake Connelly’s book on cursing, that I may have a better chance cursing away the actual feelings and beliefs.

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That is a good idea, too! I am a strong advocate for self improvement (as well as cursing those who intentionally do harm) and if you find that you have successfully banished the feelings and beliefs but still feel the need to avenge yourself, then do it without worry of payback.

One of my bullies at my last job, I had done a minor removal / protection mantra with Kali. He was gone for almost two months because he got kidnapped and pistol whipped by kids in a stolen car. I live in NYC and these things will definitely happen to you if you are drunk and an idiot alone by yourself on the street late at night.
That did not stop him or make him aware that he’s an ass whipe. That guy I still think deserves punishment, as well as someone who actively openly wants to :electric_plug: my partner

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I hope you get them good! No, some people seem highly unaware of their toxicity. Everything and everyone else is the problem as far as they can tell. You may never be able to teach him the error of his ways, but you can still get some satisfaction in magickally kicking his tail.

I’m not the one for turning the other cheek.

One thing i do for people who’ve wronged me is invoke Andromalius, tell him to read my Akashic Records, and take out anyone who wronged me going back as far as he can. It’s like a virus scan for lingering troublemakers and i’ve been told that certain people from my past suddenly weren’t doing so well when i did this…

Give it a shot if you have people who wronged you that you’re unaware of or ones you forgot about, and let Andromalius know to take EVERYONE out who has wronged you.

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