Hello, you all can call me crimson. Im basicly new here new in so many areas. Most of my life i grew up as christian. My mother was a very controlling your going to hell type. I never understood the judgement aspect of any religion and had alot of questions which ofcourse i couldnt ask because the sterotypical replies one usually gets when questioning things within the bible
Well, last christmas really woke me up, i was there and suddenly it hit me. This is wrong, i dont belong here. This is a lie. It hit me like bricks, after that i began to wonder why now. I then begin to look into everything. Wanting to see what is really real. I had a pull toward lucifer and satan. I always felt he wasnt what the bible claimed. I never felt any of the stories were real. I feel he is real, i feel like he or something is calling out to me. I was scared before, because i was told the stories of hell ans being possessed and killed exc. But now, i dont.
Over the last few years its random i know, but i felt like soneone was talking in my ear. Like a loud ringing then a voice calling out. It was so real. It would wake me up, it happened alot with dreams of being moved and pushed away. I was afarid until one day i stopped fearing. Im not sure if that makes sense but i feel maybe something is trying to talk to me, to help me. Not hurt me like i felt before.
Well now i am needing help. I want to know what to start with what to do, and if anyone can please read me and help guide me. I feel a pull toward spirtual satanism. It calls to me, threw the help of a instragram satanist who showed me quotes and realties i really want to follow this… its hard with my family, but i want to know everything. I have queastions and my life is a reck. Being cheated on stressed out and depressed i feel like this is the only area i am in control of finally. Any advice wisdom and words with help but please not negitive i get that enough in real life. Looking for friends also who can unstand what im going threw 
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Learn and practice banishing, then evoking - in that order. These two are the basis of all Magick ritual. To learn these properly takes time but it’s time well spent.
Al.
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I second @Uncle-Al.
Learn a banishing ritual. It will stand you in good stead, and protect you from obsessions, negative energy, out of control emotions, wandering spirits, curses, and rituals gone wrong, while at the same time training your skills in visualisation, and energy manipulation.
There are many different rituals to choose from. Find one that appeals to you and perform it twice daily, once in the morning, and once before bed.
While learning the banishing ritual, you can also start with some sigil magick, to get your feet wet.
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Could you tell me where i would go to find the proper spell for that? Im completely new… any advice?
I thought it said Cinnamon and not Crimson. I should go to sleep.
As I was growing up I got told that demons and satan wants your soul and if you sell your soul to the devil you’ll end up in the flames of hell and burn for an eternity and never reincarnate again.
I was scared all my life of ever meeting a demon. I guess i would be scared if something came uninvited but at least now I know how to get rid of it and working with demons rather than fearing them is quite the change.
I never imagined that I’d be contacting demons before coming here. I was scared to even see a friendly ghost. Okay I still am since paranormal stuff still scares the living shht out of me but yeah.
Oh and welcome to the forum. Going to sleep now finally
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Exectly, i was raised that way, and any and everything you did sent you to hell. I was tsught that from a very young age. But finally i just said and had the courage to question things, everything its very empowering. I was avtually looking into wicca when i felt a pull from lucifer. Denied it for a while, becsuse ya know the brainwashing but now im open to it. It feels sooo freeing. Now my family on the other hand wohld lose there minds
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Most of us here were raised in Christianity,so no need to be scared of your background.
Imagine magic/occult practice as JC said “Many are called,but few are chosen.”
As much as you put into learning and practice it will get back at you. It takes time to learn and mind to swallow.
Start with LBRP,meditation and visualization.