I was feeling really low at work tonight. Five days into my Qliphothic pathworking and I am really being open to not only my shadows but the destruction I have done to myself. Honestly, it has been opening my eyes up to how disconnected to my past and myself than ever before. While waiting for my ride home, it was pouring outside. I was planning on writing about this particular ritual yesterday, but in that moment, this was not merely an interesting thought. I NEEDED to go through with it.
Before I continue, this simple ritual has roots with my grandmother (shock and awe for those who have been keeping up with my posts lol). While she was a devote catholic, she hated the idea of man barring the way between an individual and the Divine. She found it not only wrong, but an example of one of man’s greatest signs of arrogance. So, she wrote this ritual for herself and anyone devoting themselves to God. On a particularly rainy day, she would rub dirt or dust on herself to represent her old life, thinking of both the good and the bad, as well as why she wanted to make that choice. She would then go outside, say a prayer of devotion to what she viewed the Divine as, and walk into the rain, allowing it to wash away her old life. She would call it her “Baptism by God, not by Man”.
Leaning more on the LHP side, I needless to say altered it. I stood underneath the awning at work, looking out into the rain. I took a moment to reflect on my life up to that point and acknowledge both my successes and my failures in life. I looked at my life as a man both critically but, even harder still, kindly. I saw all those memories wrapping around me like fine dust. I simply said this as my substitution for prayer:
“On this day,
The man known as (insert my legal name) is no more.
He drowns in the rain tonight,
A reward for a life of his best effort.
This life for now on is that of (insert my god name).
No more will he who is I merely work magic
He will become magic.
So it is.”
I stepped out into the rain, allowing that which is “human” wash away. I distinctly commanded the rain to come down harder and the wind to pick up, allowing me to get lost in the music of nature. It was a beautiful, awesome moment, the first of it’s kind in a very long time.
I hope you find this in anyway helpful or enjoyable in some way. Thank you for reading