Anger is consuming my entire being... pls help

Beliel is the demonization of yourself.

No Masters. You are Master to yourself.

Welcome to shadow work, babe! Learn to control the anger or else it will consume you. The fire that rages of anger don’t allow for a quick come back. And sometimes we burn bridges by accident.

List everything you hate about others and in the world - there is your shadow self. Pick one and work on it. Then work down the list.

If in anger or feeling annoyed, connect with the heart before your steam becomes fire.

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Welcome to the firestorm that is Belial. Learn to deal with it and channel it productively. There is little more to be said. I will give you this one tip. Let go. That energy will diffuse through your entire being

@makkos Feeling Trapped read this post. that’s the tai chi methods i’ve set myself on. Not too long , not too short. And base on the i ching. The 2 recommended book is a must for any soft martial artist or energy workers. especially the tai qi jin which explains core energy foundation. Tai chi without energy is just exercise. shooting blanks.

so practice the youtube videos i sent and these two books recommendation and you good to go. easy to learn however, not easy to discipline self practice on regular basis.

I don’t understand why you would deny yourself sexual pleasure? There can be powerful magick in sex if it is channeled correctly with focused intent.

Personally, I have given up all kinds of addictions over the years, but I have never considered sex an addiction (though I realize some do). For me, it’s been a great source of power that I would never dream of shutting down.

I would suggest that it might be more your addiction to believing you need sex rather than the sex itself(?) Obsessions are certainly blocks to magickal power, and if that’s the case here, you might consider learning to use it rather than abuse it. :wink:

Because sometimes the ancestors will forbid us to use sex, as we’ve hurt ourselves and others.

don’t be little the power of sex. It has destroyed many people. It’s not to be taken lightly. It’s probably more addictive as anything to most people as it’s our primal instinct. It’s in the dna. Unless your strong willed or have mind training related to it or abundance of it easily accessible ,sex can cause anyone issues.

Not everyone is into sex or a magnet of it. Many people save the energy for other pursuits. There are many great geniuses in history that is single and virgin.

And if you want to work with sexual energy or relationship stuff. you can try these demons.

Astaroth: This daemoness helps with friendship and love and is perfect for revealing hidden secrets when you are screening something or someone

Eligos: Causes love between people and reveals hidden secrets

Furfur:Furfur to increase the energy before a ritual and to increase love between a men and a woman.

Leraje: Solves conflicts and turns bad relationships into the opposite

Orobas: He is one of the most faithful daemon and loves to work
with people. Used for binding or cutting emotional attachments and to change opinions

Salos: to spark lust and desire in yourself and others

Seere: He will bring you a lot of abundance of a sudden and is also very much into lust, desire and sex

Sitri:This must be the most passionate of all. Used for sexual endeavors, passion, lust, sexual energy and stamina.

Vual: Daemon to attract the love of women

Zepar: Zepar makes women to love a men and also inspires lust and passion in them.

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Use that anger to fuel your rituals. Use it to propel yourself upwards and onwards, for your empire building, ascension, etc. You can’t stay in anger though, otherwise you get stuck. You need to raise your vibration. Meditation is a good tool, but learn to control your perception, and guard the gate to your mind. Learn to control which thoughts you’ll allow to remain in your mind. Learn to ignore what you don’t want in your life. Thoughts that cause you to feel uplifted should remain, and those are the thoughts you should dwell on and expand.

Belial is of no help to you because he can’t convey the info you need, due to your ignorance of it. It’s not a test. You just need to get reading and learning about your mind, your thoughts, your emotions - in other words, learn to control your vibration. Apply it daily.

It took me the best part of a year to feel the improvement when I did this daily, every minute of every day.

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@Faustus
Yes, of course you give me the oh so very handy advice of detaching… Okay, Belial Jr., thank you for your advice… Detach, my son, detach, detach. You people really know what’s best for me but DAMN…

@Mornaug
I do not deny myself sexual pleasure. It is not one of my addictions and therefore I am able to bang whenever I please. My problem comes from simply having no interest in sex without love. I am a firm believer that sex is pointless without a nurturing relationship. I agree it can fuel ritual very well but I simply don’t chase it. The other problem is not a single female attracts me… I find them rather stupid and annoying and need to conquer this as well, but I don’t even feel like trying with these women. They’re all the same. I don’t crave sex. I don’t need it.

@wisepup
I explain my beliefs on sex in the above reply. I am not a magnet for it. I simply don’t chase it.

@silverfirefly
Do you really think it’s a good idea? I am afraid that my anger will destroy any and all effects of ritual unless the ritual is baneful in some effect. You are opening my eyes. I believe my vibration is low. Even now when typing this and admitting it’s low made me pissed as all Hell. I don’t want it to be low and that bothers me. It needs fixed. Now I’m pissed. The issue lies within myself. I am a fool. Your advice is extremely helpful. I must master my energies. I need to practice tai chi and control my thoughts.

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With that, you are on your own.

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I hope you did not take offense to that. I was simply kidding as Belial says the same thing as you. I sincerely appreciate your advice as I need all the help I can get. I am weak right now.

Alright. You suffer because you resist. This will escalate until you do what we are both telling you to do. And i did not say detach. i said let go. You are holding tight and trying to keep it in check. Release the tension in your chest

I can help you, if you want. PM me.

Embrace the anger. Avoiding is fultile. That’s the only way to get past the anger by finding it’s source. Any suggestion to push it aside is just repressing it. It’s also not about being above the anger. That’s another escapism approach.

How does that work? Will you rely on him to get you through this? Quitting everything cold turkey is very hard. You need a support system or a plan on how you’re gonna stay clean.

Anger is what was suppressed by your addictive substance and behavior so now that’s gone, it comes quickly to the surface. I highly recommend a therapist specializing in your your area of addiction.

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@Sonic
Your answer struck a chord in me. I am young. I am naive. You opened my eyes… I was using drugs, masturbation, and cigarettes to cope with my emotions. Now that they are gone it only makes sense that this anger is coming to the surface… I learn something new every day from this forum. I have not touched these substances in a month and one week now. I don’t plan on going back. I’m not addicted, but I am angry. I won’t be seeing a therapist, however, as I feel like using all the methods provided in this thread I can finally heal this anger. I believe it is from some deep rooted trauma. I am determined to heal it. I am determined to channel it.

@Antony
You are most certainly right about him provoking people. But maybe I’m just stupid. Maybe this isn’t even Belial… I think it’s just me being a silly young kid who never dealt with the trauma throughout his life and once the substance abuse was taken away the anger only became clearer. I can agree with you now. I don’t think repressing anything is going to do me any good… I won’t see a therapist because I hate them. They never work and it’s quite clear that MOST of them don’t give a shit about you. I’m going to heal myself. I’m going back to nature. I’m going to start exercising and practicing Tai Chi.

Thank you to everybody who has answered this thread. I appreciate and value every single one of you. I woke up this morning angry as fuck as usual. I went out to my garage and SCREAMED. I simply yelled until my throat hurt and my chest felt lighter. I came back inside and suddenly I was sad. It’s quite obvious that I myself am the problem. This is a test of healing from both Belial and the universe. It’s time to fix myself. It’s time to bring this bullshit to the surface and heal. I have been running for centuries now. It’s no wonder why I have such huge amounts of emotions coursing through my body.

I will say this: I am happy to be able to start my healing at such a young age. I do not believe I would make it if I was 40-years-old and dealing with this shit. I am so grateful to be so young. I can fix this shit early.

Thank you to everyone. I owe you guys. I won’t be answering this thread anymore as I have found my answers. I’ll see you guys around.

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And why are you bound to what your ancestors tell you to do? I don’t mean disrespect by this question, but if you are a practicing black magician (and I recognize not everyone here is), your life is yours to do with what you Will.

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I don’t believe Magick is either black or white. It’s just Magick to me. I wanted to work with Beliel, so, I worked with him. If I want to learn about something, I take the time to research it. Learn about it and make it my own.

I’m currently in a path working with Satan, because I already know him. People talk about how dark the Magick is, how they want choas - fine, choose the choas if it’s right for you. It’s not choatic for me, I make it as simple as possible for myself in order to not get burnt out.

And frankly, I am bound because I used sex as a revenge tactic. I’m not allowed to put love spells on another or to help me find love - because you can’t really love another until you fully love yourself. There has to be an honest connection with my next relationship, if I am granted to have one.

Trust me, it’s been hard. The last year hasn’t been easy. I’ve been through some things I wouldn’t wish upon my enemy. Sex is just sex without connection. I know how to tap into my primal.

While I get life is more than just sex, I had to come through a lesson on sexual healing. With the sexual healing came a realization. If I can accept the imperfections of myself, it’s easier to look at others and realize they have faults that can be overlooked. Unless they were harmful to others.

For me, my life is my own. But I will respect what I have been taught. I was so detached from myself a year ago, I was very mean. I was disrespectful to others. Kindness doesn’t come easy for me.

I’ve learned in the past year to mostly keep to myself. I can have conversations and I am the biggest loner you’ll ever meet. I’ve never had a lot of friends. A lot of people I know. But, my family (my parents, my sister) have only really seen the real me.

While you may call yourself a Black Maigican, I just see a Magician who is probably mirrored in some way to me. You’re wiser than me, so, I can learn from you.

Now, back to the being bound to what my ancestors say. This is only matters of the heart and in love. The emotional connection has to be real, because I’m shy about my heart. I have a hard time being touched. But I don’t mind touching others.

People get to abrasive, I still shut down at times. The timid part of my spirit comes and shields me. Most of the time I’m quiet.

They say sticks and stones can break your bones - but words can never hurt you. That is a lie. Sometimes someone can say something to you that affects your subconscious that it takes a therapist to pull it out and that’s when the healing starts.

The details don’t matter. But when you’re a teenager and your own flesh and blood states the words “You’re nothing but a simple headed bitch” - the lie can be repeated over and over.

It’s all about healing. My ancestors want someone like my Father to be a partner, they come far and few between. They want me around people who live. Not gripe about their situation.

And I didn’t feel disrespected. You asked, I answered.

Thank you for your reply. I understand a bit better now where you’re coming from. You are exactly correct that there is only magick not black or white. I was speaking in terms used in this forum.

I’ve had similar experiences to yours, though I lived quite a few years exploring casual sex. I agree – it is far better in a committed relationship, so long as you have the right partner.

The fact that you are asking here for insight from others puts you years ahead of so many others your age.

I hope you find what you seek. :slight_smile:

Thank You. :heartpulse::heart: