The deaths I speak of happened when I ate Amanita Var. Formosa which I found, or was given to by the gnomish kingdoms of thee area, and prepared properly for 3 days. I was camping with my family, they kicked in and I had superman energy and it was only building, i ate something and was feeling it really kicking in, I got in my sleeping bag, that’s when it started… the infinite fucking loop… ohh my godd though… I relived the last couple minutes over and over again in my head, when I got up and out of it, not even a minute had passed. The repeat was like a repetitive algorithm. I couldn’t figure out how to get out of my sleeping bag for like the longest time or so it felt… When I got out of the sleeping bag i put my hands in reverse prayer position and stuck them in the tiniest hole above my crown chakra which i then had to pry myself out of this pinhole and it was like my body was grinding metal, the screeching sound of coming out of that hole though… and I felt like I was dead, I asked my family to take me to the hospital. That’s when it started… fuck… it’s really hard reliving this, my body is reliving it as well… holy shit.

So I started fucking dying dude… I went through what was like the black hole of death. When I died, it was like a singularity point, but I came back on the other side, the other side of the next moment! At that point every moment was stretched out to infinity and beyond. I had to repeat every moment over and over again with increasing speed, until the experience of the moment got so fast that I had to die again into the next moment. Then I would experience the next moment starting at the fastest speed and decreasing in speed until it slowed down so much that i had to die into the next moment. Then it would start the next moment at that slowest speed and go back to increasing speed until I died again into the next moment. I felt like a worm inching through the helical chasms of fucking HELL. Everytime I died I would screeaaaammm, screech, or yell something like HOLLYYY SHIIIITTT, or JESUS CHRRIIIISST. And then I would repeat that word every time I experienced a moment and I would say it with the speed or slowness of the current frame.

After we got to the hospital I tried to kill myself in order to get back into the death portal because I wanted to die properly, i didn’t want anything to go wrong with my death, so I arched my back over the back of the chair i was sitting in and tried to break my spine over the chair by forcing my back down on it to split it right on the backside of my solar plexus so that my soul could shoot straight through the peak of my arched body. At that point I went to purgatory. It was all white, white like the flesh of the mushroom I ate, no ego or thought, just all white. Nothing, it wasn’t a heavenly white either. It was purgatory bland white. My family told me at this point I was on the floor rolling around with my fists clenched so tight my fingernails were making my palms bleed. My blood pressure they told me was 240 over something else really high.

When I was put into a shackled bed I was so gone, I went to a place all dark but there was this wheel. It was like the wheel of samsara because on each spoke was an incarnation of a soul, I could see their faces. But the wheel was like perpendicular to another wheel, they were connected in the middle somehow. But the spokes on this wheel would flip up one by one indicating the soul had retreated back into this astral wheel after death. Then I would see the spokes flip down one by one indicating people were incarnating into their bodies. I had the choice to go back into my body, but the graciest fucking thing, yo… I had to take someone elses place who could of incarnated in my place in another body. So I took the place of this person in order to come back to my body.

Then I experienced the birth and death of the universe and I saw Jesus literally having the last laugh at thee end of time.

Transcendence of time and space is thee embodiment of the plasma body. You learn to access thee axis of all time, it’s like holofractographic in nature. Time becomes a space that you can move through. There are obviously limitations. But negentropy is key to this. Research Dan Winter to learn more.

Christ didn’t imprint on me when I was in the throne room. Christ came to me on an ayahuasca trip when I was drowning in the sea of revelation, this was a totally separate trip. The throne room Lucifer brought me to behold his visage at a Christian based farm rehab in Colorado was brought on I believe because I saw the face of Christ in that separate ayahuasca trip, and it’s like Lucifer wanted to balance the scales. But anyway, I took 4 hits of the strongest, purest LSD and it was near the end of the trip when everything had died down, than it just came out of nowhere, the blissful waves of light massaging my body like a full body orgasm on heroin but so much more spiritual. He manifested in front of me as everything around me but it all disintegrated and lasers started coming out of nowhere like a really hardcore techno blast of sirens vrooming and forming the throne room decked with the highest sort of glamour you would want to get your hands on, but all I heard was this gutteral moan that turned into a rushing wind that took me to my knees like a tempest.

(I’m resharing this from the demigod thread because I went through all the trouble to answer the many sarcastic questions thrown at me, and didn’t even get a fucking like)

I believe the amanita was showing me what it’s like to be born as a mushroom. The gnomes definitely initiated me into something deep having to do with vril, I’ve realised over time.


Its hard to read, but putting the “f :duck: ing” and the concept of Christ aside I think I get basics. You should turn down a notch on the drugs for a while, even if they have shamanic properties that can be helpful too much of a good thing can certainly kill you. If this is realy a narrative experience you had theres spiritual value to it, dont get me wrong in there.
Dying is an experience which one can learn so much of oneself (there are more ways than the carnal one), doing it in consecutive order becomes a grueling experience however so I can relate to that, but I didnt attempt commit suicide in real live to get out of that loop, THAT can only make things worse, and is not that easy to be born with a physical body as you saw from that wheels you describe.

Why would he laugh?

Fancy term, I like it; as I see it everything is sick and dying, in a constant state of decay. So being healthy or sane are not antonyms of sick or crazy, but the ability to regenerate against the decay is what keeps you healthy and sane as these are not crystallize states.

Throne of what or where?

I haven´t spoke to him but that sounds like it serves a particular purpose better than doing the opposite, as popularly believed.

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I hear ya. I’ve been in the singularity and seen this too, although the way we interpreted it is a little different. For me, it was witnessing what the RHP call “unity” and hearing the sound that is “the word of God”.
That was the thing that made me veer off to the Left. I’d rather be the universe as opposed to being a piece within it that is ultimately consumed.

Yep. Lucifer is all about balance.

I believe he was laughing his full heartily belly laugh like you would picture Santa laughing, because he knows that everyone is going to be ok in the end and all this suffering will be a good laugh when we come into full realization of the ressurection and whatever it means. I was only seeing his shadow though, and I don’t remember much of the birth and death of the universe except for the intense sound, and waking up, shackled in the hospital bed with my grandmother holding my hand, I look into her eyes with the most serious expression I’ve ever made in my life and said “I just experienced the universe…”

Oh and the throne room was made of pure plasma of the highest quality colors, it had the gravity of a titanic place. It was in the shape of an inverted pentacle, Lucifer had his form set into this throne, Lucifer Lind of resembled baphomet, but it was less anthropomorphic and more like a geometrically sound elite alien ruler.

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Don’t you think if you were going to come into the fullness of your potential, or, become the universe, you would need to assimilate and integrate both sides? This is why I consider myself a sovereign diplomat of the omniverse.

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YES. That’s my jam right there.

What do you think of the Universe, as a collective of physical beings bound to reincarnation, is subject to the same rebith cycle (yuga cycle etc.)?

That throne room sounds familiar but I cant put my finger on why, pehaps you have an audience of sorts.

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Mushrooms are the teachers of arcane secrets.


I believe in thee omniverse. As above so below, our lives reflect the life of a universe just as they reflect the life of a beetle. I think universae do have life spans, and that reincarnation is only ever of the one life, thee omniverse.


I think that we are living all of our “lives” simultaneously, when we consider the notion that Time doesn’t exist in the way we think of it. Every moment, and every possible moment, is happening right now. All of our lives, possibilites, etcetera, playing out right…now.


I work under thee assumption that everything I’m perceiving right now is symbolic of everything that’s happening everywhere allways. Like the simple placement of objects in relation to eachother, it’s always a highly sophisticated metaphor signifying all things that are happening, and all that ever has happened, as well as all that ever will. Like this moment, and the way your senses are describing it to you is an instance, a story describing it all. And we can tap into this through the axis mundi and thee aqua vitæ. When we tap into the butterfly power through this, we can use our intuition to catch a strand connected to the other end of the planet in Syria and work from an angle to resolve some of this tension.