Advice to a victim of incest

What would be a spiritual advice that you would give to a victim of incest?

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People are individuals, would depend what they feel they need, how it affected them, things like that.

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You are right about that. It was too broad. I need to think more about it. Maybe I should remove it and rephrase it.

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Have you seen this?

The question is pretty broad but like EA talks about the major factor in abused people who become black magicians is reclaiming the power in their lives. Reclaiming dignity. I would encourage any person struggling with abuse to 1. Realize it’s not their fault. They didn’t do something to deserve it in a past life or any of that religious-victim-blaming-bullshit. 2. Realize that they have power in their life. Perhaps that would include jokingly saying " hey, you can always curse them or anyone who does that to you again" not necessarily to get them to do it but to make them know that they do have avenues of control.

Therapy is good.

Working out or sports as a healthy outlet should be encouraged.

All in all, the most important thing is to be a good friend to them because after being betrayed like that, the victim needs the comfort of having SOMEONE they can count on. Letting them know that they have that does quite a bit itself.

I hope this helps.

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Also, speaking being trauma victim myself, working on learn to empty your head through meditation, working on the energy for exemple with the shiatsu, doing sports regularly that can help to feel better internally like yoga,… These examples helped me a lot

and exactly like @JezebelleMoon said :

And even, realize that trauma, no matter how horrible, can strengthen us mentally when we get emotionally detached from the event. So also a big work on that is much needed.

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Same. Agreed.

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Thank you. I very much appreciate your reply. It makes me think of many things. First and foremost I can reveal that the victim was myself. I just felt like asking in the third person. Maybe to get it a little away from myself although I am anonymous in here. The constant questioning of so many things in my life, always in an inwards way, you could say a shape-shifting way, has begun to make sense. It is a shock when memories of these things come back and there are waves of thinking and feeling that this cannot possibly be true which are then replaced by waves of knowing without a doubt that they are. It is very draining, confusing and my whole world view was basically shattered, when I experienced this. Intuitively I have reacted and acted in different ways because of this, at that time, subconscious knowledge. The body is the biggest recorder possible, the singer Shelley Hirsch once said and when a memory is released is very unpredictable.

I have a hard time trusting anyone, and I have run into people whom I found out I could not trust at all. The attraction to something well-known can be destructive in that way.

I will go into therapy in the future. I know that now, because I had a first meeting about it today.

There are a lot of things to this but right now the sorrow is what I think of the most. This sorrow of missing something I never had. The betrayal of that. Deeply confusing issues to deal with.

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It will take time. But you will be ok. Watch that video darlin.

I’ve been abused and had to go to therapy and everything to so I empathize.

Keep a journal about your therapy. Call it your healing journal. Write about what you talked about, your thoughts, when feelings come up write them out, but make note of your progress to.

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A journal is a good idea. Thanks again.

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You’re more than welcome. :blue_heart:

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Couldn’t add more, I did the same but I was in the hospital for a few months, completely destroyed.
Now, when I re-read my diary, I see the evolution that’s why it is very important to detail your emotions, thoughts,… as @JezebelleMoon said!

Courage, it’s always a long path but the light is never too far.

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Thank you. I got out of a serious problem with alcohol close to twelve years ago. The understanding of that has become clearer than ever now. The constant attempt to find somewhere to be, an attempt to create a room/a feeling/a body but not physical to be in. I also start to understand my one, and only, out-of-body-experience back when I was a young teenager. I have been writing, almost manically at times in my life, exploring what words can and cannot do and a lot of that writing has later revealed certain things. I think writing and singing and perhaps most of all that music has been essential in my life. Well, I could talk forever right now but enough for now. Thank again for your kind words.

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Don’t be down on yourself for feeling sad or angry. Let yourself feel what you feel. And don’t try to bury your memories of the event. Let it all come out. Hell, do a ritual or a curse if you feel like you need to. So sorry you had to go through this. I’ve been through sexual trauma twice, and EA’s video helped me accept it as part of what made me who I am today.

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Yes, anger feels especially good these days. Thoughts of killing the one who did it feels good. The energy that goes out from my body like that is powerful. I might do a ritual with my magic staff. I did so when I was cutting ties with a lot of toxic people.

Anger has been the most forbidden feeling in my past life. I see why now.

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Feeling anger almost feels like simultaneous release and acceptance. But don’t let the anger consume you, I’ve learned that lesson the hard way.

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This is exactly the same for me, I started writing poetry and texts to externalize my emotions since I was 11 it’s really helpfull and music ( I started also ) can be something to help since you’re focus on something else, something that provide you pleasure.

If you feel the need to externalize don’t hesitate, here or in pm with me or somebody you feel confident with! As far as I’ve seen nobody judges here.

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And totally agree with this

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It is late here where I live so I will go to bed now. It has been most helpful to read your replies. I feel the anger is just very short experiences so I won’t be consumed by that. I have projects to make, a poetry collection and more music and now there is structure to what will happen when it comes to healing from this so I feel peaceful about that. People who deeply hurt me in my life are out, never coming back. Things are going in the right direction.

You are also welcome to pm me if you like.

:green_heart:

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I’m glad you’re expressing yourself with art and music! That really helps me. If you or anyone whose gone through this sort of experience wants to talk, my PMs are always open :v:

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There is an open space for people in my town where people who have experienced these things can meet twice a week, so I will contact them as I was recommended yesterday. Good thing to know there is a place to go while waiting for the therapy itself.

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