Advice from anyone willing to help

Hey. So as I have mentioned in a previous post I reached my limit, I truly got to a point where every little thing makes me angry because I’ve had enough. I’ve had enough suffering, I’ve had enough abuse, I’ve had enough bad luck. So I found magick and I hung on to it as my last hope to get some revenge on the people who used and abused me and to turn my life around.

I’ve recently purchased all Gordon Winterfield’s books and I have been studying them religiously, I made notes of everything, got a new folder, have everything organized. I have tried a few rituals but I’m not feeling like they worked at all, I didn’t even feel anything “different” during the ritual, I know the author states you might not feel anything at all, but still…

If you are willing to help me out giving me some pointers, advice, anything at all, I’d be extremely thankful!

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How long have you waited for results? What have you done besides the rituals (currently or in the past) ? It may help with giving any advice, tbh.

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I was in a relationship for 3 years (my first ever boyfriend). He humiliated me, insulted me left and right, cheated on me, laughed (many times) when I told him I was in so much pain I wanted to end my life, among many other things. The consequences of what he did to me are still very much present, the trauma he gave me, the feeling of being worthless. I want him to suffer x1000 what he did to me.

Other people are involved on this story. His mother is just as much as a narcissist as he is, she knew about my suffering and would tell him how I was manipulative and would look down on me. The girl he cheated on me with, she still stalks me on social media like I was the “other girl”, she even posted a photo with him and tagged me “accidentally” so I’d see it. I’m DONE and I want every single one of these people to pay.

I’ve started only about 2 weeks ago, I know it’s early, I just thought I’d feel something, anything.

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Have you done any meditation - whether silent or using audio?

Did you clear yourself out before the workings you tried?

What were you expecting to feel (assuming you haven’t done any energy work in the past)?

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No, are there any links on YouTube you recommend?

And to be honest I don’t know what I was expecting to feel, the author says you could feel nothing or a change in the room temperature, change in the lighting, a sort of “supernatural” feeling.

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Honestly, I’d use the search function and see what’s worked for someone else. I typically use a band called Paleowolf (typically the song Origins and Stone). It may not be your thing, but there are several threads where people suggest different videos and/or frequencies. Some may be more effective for you than others, both in frequencies and video, with quality being a thing.

Fair enough. Just because you didn’t feel anything, didn’t mean it wasn’t successful. BUT holding on and looking for the result is a really good way of ruining a working. I would use the search function for looking for phrases like “lusting after results” and “letting go after spell (or working)” .

Finally, as dumb as it may sound, have you spent some time outside recently? Sometimes, a quick walk can help make harder moments a little easier. This would naturally depend on your area and safety is a thing, but if you can spend a little time connecting with some sort of nature, it may help. For example, even if I only go outside at night to my pitifully small backyard, it still seems to help on those nights where I’m still stressed or in a shitty mood from work/Life. I go out in the dark, maybe use a candle and incense, and put on Paleowolf to help zone out for a little bit before going to sleep. Helps keep my sleep a little higher quality, which makes the next day a little easier.

Hope some of this helps in some way.

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I can tell from what you’ve written that your emotions are most certainly clouding your abilities. Yes, Winterfield is right by saying you may not feel anything. So do you want to feel something?

I recommend daily meditation to ease your mind. Before you start doing rituals all Willy Nilly you must ground yourself. Going into a ritual upset or angry will only hinder the results (unless you’re cursing somebody). You must have a strong focus and intended goal for the ritual. I hope I have helped.

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If you may allow, I would like to ask you something…

WHY do you wish to feel something?

It is most likely, someone who hasn’t done anything in that regard previously, may also not feel something from the workings at all. And most often, that’s not a necessity. Things may already started happening to move towards the results you asked.

To come back to that question… WHY do you want to feel it? Just out of knowing? Or do you wish to feel, that you managed to do harm to them? As part of your revenge?

What they did to you, for sure are horrible things. I’m all on your side here. Nobody should have to suffer such abuse.

However, as I tend to say to those trying to change their lifes in similar cases: If you are keep dealing with the people and the situations of the past, you still keep them in your life, and cannot move forward. They still have power over you and/or your emotions and still cause even more suffering, even if they are no longer near one . One cannot move into a different life and let these things truely behind them. But, they are still governing their emotions, their actions, causing desperations or something else, and generally taking energy away from what you’d want to be your future.

Try to move forward and no longer care about them. At all.

Know, there are other people out there, who would be able to love you and not treat you like this at all. Try finding those, put your energy there, instead on these same people of the past, who already took “everything” from you… try to not waste more of it on them. For your own good.

:orange_heart:

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I use binaural music when I meditate

These help me when I was in a bad Spot. Emotions tend to cause a lot of blocks.

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Pray to spirits of punishment , physical offerings are the way to go

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I understand it’s the “better thing to do”. To just move on, but the problem is that how can I when they have taken so much from me? I tried to move on, I met this great guy and then I ghosted him completely for absolutely no reason other than I am traumatized and full of emotional scars because of what those people did to me.

Also, as Gordon Winterfield said “Those who attack out of a need for justice have inexhaustible energy.”

I know I also need to work on myself, on healing, on moving on and I am also planning on doing so, absolutely. But I also need my revenge from these people.

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I know how hard it is to see, how it could be possible, when someone is deeply involved.

But trust me, revenge is not helping you, it is the cause of the same suffering continuing and not allowing healing to happen.

The easiest way I found of healing from things others did to me, was, if you believe it or not, forgiving. I know I know… “forgive them after all they did to me?” you will say. Well, you won’t do it for them. You will do it for yourself! How is that possible? Acknowlegde, that these people are in bad place themselves and even more blind to things good. Acknowledge, that they are and will be always miserable. While you have done the first step to let their misery behind you. See them on what could fit in their case: They may never be able to see love when they find it, while you can. They would be left alone from others, because of their behaviour. They will be in the long run more poor, because of who they are. Things like these could help you to forgive them and leave them behind. See, where they are more poor than you because of the things you suffered because of them. Telling then yourself “You are not worth my time any longer” and even maybe “You are not even worth of my revenge.”… because remember, you are still giving THEM your time. Because you do it, because of them. The time of YOUR life.

And it won’t make you feel any better. It won’t help you, moving on or do any healing. It won’t cure the suffering and scars of your past.

Such scars, as sad it is, you’ll carry them all your life. But, they don’t have to be your main focus. Instead, they can become something to grow bigger from. As heroes carry their scars. With the correct approach and the focus on yourself, than rather them, of course.

And for the “inexhaustible energy”… well, you may get it now, but, what if this may exhaust you to an extent, that you won’t have the energy to live a different life without them afterwards? Why allow THEM to do this too, to you?

Truely, you have to get them out of your thoughts and out of your life asap.
Only, if you disallow for them to have any effect on your life, on your emotions, on your actions… only then you’ll be truely free of them.

It is truely within our power, to allow others to still have power over us or to say:

“No, you won’t make me still react on you. I won’t allow, that you still have this power over me, making me (re-)act because of you. I’m standing over it and won’t allow you to take even more of my life and my energy and my time.”

And only then, you’ll start enjoying things coming in your life again, because then you’ll truely have left it behind.

Besides, magickal workings may take some time to manifest, anywhere between days to many months. You gonna wait and suffer all that long?

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After one initial crazy experience, it took many months to make something work. Magick is work. And needs you to put the time and the effort.

Keep going, you’re fine.

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yeah it took me a few months actually to manifest something significantly. Now i’ve no problem “feeling” and even “seeing” things (even from the time i was a born again christian) but a result that i could go “heck yeah, there’s no way i could’ve gotten this without magick”… Now i can manifest things way way easier.
I was getting small things from the beginning tho. Small results that were just enough to keep me going. But i wasn’t just with one book of magick.
My recommendation would be that you work different types of magick meanwhile. Like, get Words of Power, Angels of Alchemy and Magickal Protection… Hammer those meanwhile. Those books are mostly for working on yourself… and your ability to get some good out of others and life.

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Which ones did you do? 1,2, or 3?

Have you tried any real world physical vindication outside of magick? Sometimes that cuts to the chase and is more satisfying than casting a spell and wishful hoping with baited breath. But in the physical realm, of course, that takes more courage, is higher risk, and one must consider multiple angles of discretion.

So for starters, it’s about where your coming from. In my workings I’ve found that being in a low vibrational state (ex: mad, angry, sad, etc) often had little effect on a spell and can even backfire and reverse the workings. (Not criticizing anyone here.) In my experience I have found that baneful magick doesn’t work for me. Perhaps it’s just not compatible with my energy, but it doesn’t work for me. An alternative I have found is doing a shadow session and then an energy clearing session. Afterwards, I perform an amplified karmic return spell, which is much more potent, as it is cast in a higher vibrational state. This workong is a little long, as and you can also simply do a mirror return action spell (not the one below), but this works on so many other levels at the same time. Here’s the working:

  1. Get in a meditative state. Visualize yourself drinking, and as you do so imagine your shadow separating from yourself. Look at them in the eye, and then say: “I acknowledge your presence. Show me the root of my problems and it’s influence on me, that I may weed it out and learn the lessons to advance myself. I Sry the boundary that you can reveal what it is I must know and u allow you to portray the depths of my emotion. However I place this restriction on you that you will not overcome and overstep the purpose of this exercise, and I will not succumb to you. Mote it be!” Visualize their human form dissipate and form a black dome around you
  2. Meditate. When it feels like the right time imagine your shadow dissolve from the dome, and take on the human appearance. Thank them, and visualize them take their place under you as your shadow.
  3. If you still feel the need to, perform this spell. While in front of a mirror, visualize the person’s face and visualize them in front of a golden scale imagine any spirit you feel necessary, is seated app the scale. Now visualize yourself in that space, surrounded in blue light. Feel all the pain the caused you, let the memories come back and let it fill your aura. Then visualize your Asia in its purest form/color move from your Chakras and push this energy out and superstructure it from you. Turn this separated energy into a ball and give it to the spirit. Say: “and by this I give the misdeeds and actions to those assigned to judge, asking that their actions be returned 3 fold. Mote it be.”
  4. Close
  • It goes without saying that this working does call for a sacred space, so any space cleansers you know perform and be sure to close. Also any spirit you contact may or may not have their own summoning specifications. Use that if needed*

Joy of Satan.org has great information for improving yourself spiritually which is a Necessity for magick