Hi. I wanted to ask about something that happened to me for like 1-2 years ago and see if anyone have experienced something similar, and know what actually happened?
I called Belial for help with a particular situation. Everything with the acual ritual went well and I felt good, and I got the feeling that Belial also approved of everything. The ritual worked, also. No problems there either. I’ve gotten the impression that He has always been fond of me since everytime I call Him, I confront the situation head on myself, and this seems to be something He appreciate very much instead of just using Him as a servitor while hiding in safety behind the altar.
Well, the strange thing happend AFTER the ritual was complete. At this time, I was still inexperienced in ritual work, so I used a banishing medium afterwards. Nothing fancy, just benzoin incense which I read in a book works well for these things. But as the incense burned, and I sat and wrote about the experience in my journal, I started to get a bad feeling in and around my heart. I didn’t knew what was going on, so I just kept writing, and observed the inner process. But after a couple of more minutes, it started to hurt and I can’t really explain the feeling but after a while it felt like something was tearing up a huge fucking wound in my soul. I did some divination and asked if I should burn the sigil, because I think this was the first time that I kept a sigil open even after the ritual was finished (normally, at that time, I just burned them right after the ritual). But my tarot cards urged me to keep the sigil open and I was very confused…
Even today, I still don’t know what the hell happened. That wound stayed with me for a long time, and I felt it everytime I did something that made me feel energy intensely. Though it did dissapear as the months passed by…
It almost happened another time I summoned Odin, and that time, I also used benzoin… Though this time I put that incense out before the same thing happened again.
So, what do you guys think/know? Is it just the incense that fucks me up for some reason, or is it the gods that HATE it? Or is it something else that I have entirely missed!?
I don’t use banishing anymore. It both works and feels better to let them stay and go as they like.