Like many of us on here, I struggle to meet girls. Sure, I could conjure a spirit or cast a spell to solve this issue. In fact, this weekend I plan on doing so as an experiment. However, to me, obtaining anything is a process. It’s about figuring out how this process works and taking steps to go through it. Magick doesn’t remove the process so that you can skip ahead. But it can help move the process along and into your favor.
In a previous comment on a post, I related it to playing a trading card game. If you’re using a preconstructed deck that you don’t know how to play against several people with decks that they’ve built themselves, no spell can help you. You have to make an effort to learn how to play your own deck and edit it yourself. Then, with magick, you’ll stand a better chance.
In ways of finding a girlfriend, I’ve also said in a previous post that I’d rather the girls come to me instead of me going to them. I get how unrealistic this may sound, but hear me out. I feel as if, in the attraction stage, the qualities that girls/women are attracted to all involve the man not needing them. As in, the more you try to impress them or get their attention, the less likely you are to succeeding. Unless you’re in a Hallmark movie. Ideally, the act of impressing women should be a byproduct of something else entirely. So, it’s the need for a relationship that makes men less attractive. But when they just stop needing it, focus on what they enjoy doing, and get one’s work/skill noticed, they may get what they want.
Course, it’s never THAT easy. There’s still lots of things to think about. In my case, part of the problem is a lack of appropriate girls to date. Because I live in a small farming town, and that my college has more early college students, I’m around more teens than I am actual college students. And with those who are college students, people here tend to marry really young. That’s not my goal at all.
I do have access to a local city where there are clubs and bars with people more around my desired demographic. Though the problem there transforms from me not being in the right place to me not knowing how to navigate the environments I want to be in. So, I end up going to the occasional strip club or titty bar to practice how I talk to women. There are some who go to game stores, but I do not hit on women there. Most go with boyfriends, and overall, that’s not why they’re there.
Like I said, I COULD just summon a spirit for this purpose. However, at that point I have two choices. Either let them be in charge of the process, and take whatever they give me. Or take an active role in making these decisions and have the spirit take care of the finer details. I’m more into the second option.
Overall, I won’t be meeting girls by doing what I’m currently doing. I need to expand my narrow list of interests. This will not only expand my social outlets, but also might help refine me into someone more attractive. I don’t admit this too much, but I’m not that bad to look at. In my current state, I’m kinda chubby, suffer from acme, have no fashion sense, and my hair is long and rather awkward. I admit to being awkward to look at, but with some refining, I can look pretty good. But refining myself will involve trying new things.
This coming Wednesday, after a Spanish test, the folks will take the dog to see a relative. I’ll have the rest of the day to myself, so I’ve decided to go to the city. I’ve found a skate park and skate shop in the area, so I’m considering checking it out. I plan on transferring to a school over there, so I might decide to skate there. I’ve always had some curiosity to skate boarding, but never had the courage or place to do it. I might be able to meet some girls there, but that should be the last thing on my mind.
As long as I maintain a “I’m not here to meet girls” mentality, work on myself and my passions, and use magick to fill out the smaller details, I think I’ll be fine. Though, the closer I get to a sense of personal security and accomplishment, I think I’ll become more active in attraction based magick, once I become someone, physically and emotionally, that I think is attractive.