I took a nap for a couple of hours. I needed the rest after working to raise my Kundalini today.
As I lay in bed on my stomach, I snapped awake.
I saw a large black left hand reaching down over my face. The hand was much larger than my own hand and the fingers were pointed toward the ground. It was about 6 inches in front of my face and felt like it was reaching over and around the top of my head from the back.
I laughed and called out “I see you!” The hand faded from sight as I came up out of the trance state.
I went to the bathroom and took a piss. While standing there, I kept feeling like there was something behind me. It didn’t frighten me and I’ve often felt powerful spirits approach me from behind.
I went back to my bedroom to put on my clothes and saw a pool of black shadow moving around at my feet. I couldn’t see it clearly, so I just stood there and watched it, allowing my eyes to adjust to the dark.
I extended my left hand and called it to surround my left hand. I was hoping I could see it more clearly. I felt the energy flow around my left hand, but I couldn’t really see anything there.
One odd thing that started to happen was that my left index finger and left middle finger started to fade away, like they had become invisible. I could see the second knuckle on my index finger and middle finger, but everything above it was gone. As I turned my hand, I watched them fade back in and then disappear again. I could even see the left ring finger and pinky behind it, so it was very much like those fingers had disappeared rather than something blocking my view of them.
I stood there for I don’t know how long. And then I tried to communicate with this energy. I asked who it was and it didn’t answer. I asked several times. No answer.
So I told it to come again when it was ready to speak to me and then I flicked my left hand upward, like I was shooing a bird that had landed on my hand.
I felt a chill go up my back. Not a chill like something had come up behind me unexpectedly. No, this was a chill like something warm had been standing against my back and had left when I flicked my hand upward.
I appreciated the interesting experience, but I had work to do.
So I came into my living room, sat in a chair facing north, and began the Black Sun meditation E.A. suggests on one of his videos.
I used my own version of mental projection to soul travel to a flat desert plain and watched the Black Sun rise in the west.
I felt energy flowing in through my eyes and down into my heart center, feeling the Black Sun residing within me growing with each breath.
I felt the shadow of the Black Sun fall across me, the gentle warmth sweep over my skin, and saw a deep purple nimbus surround the Black Sun. As I watched it with the same intensity I sungazed this morning, I breathed in the dark energy from it. Squiggly rays of deep purple spread outward from the Black Sun.
I felt awe at how close and powerful it was. And I continued to breathe in the energy, feeding the Black Sun within me.
As I sat there, breathing in the dark energy of the Black Sun, I heard myself begin to chant the Dark Speech. I listened briefly as the powerful sounds flowed out of me more rhythmically than they did the first time … and then I just released the need to listen and allowed it to happen.
An unknown time later, I deeply inhaled and breathed the darkness out through my heart center, surrounding myself completely with a cloud of Living Darkness. As I breathed, it drew closer to me, watching me as I watched it. I was back in my living room, sitting in my chair, my entire room filled with the cloud of Living Darkness.
I sat breathing for I don’t know how long, allowing the Living Darkness to caress my skin as I inhaled and feeling it gently flow away as I exhaled.
I had flowed from the Black Sun meditation directly into the Darkness meditation from the First Flame of the OAA.
And then I breathed the Living Darkness back into my heart center and breathed it out as my own aura, feeling it fill the room.
Breathing it in then breathing it out, feeling and imagining my aura filling my entire apartment complex.
Breathing it in then breathing it out, feeling and imagining my aura filling my entire town.
Again, my aura filling my entire state.
Again, my aura filling the entire world.
Again, my aura filling the entire universe.
And I sat there, breathing the darkness in and expanding my aura, filling the entire universe.
I flowed from the Darkness meditation into the Aura Expansion exercise from BMOA.
I was counting breaths by touching the tips of my fingers. My original plan was to do it for 9 breaths, but I found a very unusual thing happening on the 8th breath.
As I breathed, I felt as though I were the universe itself breathing. I stopped counting and just breathed … and when I breathed, the universe breathed.
I lost all sense of time and just existed, breathing.
And when I returned, I knew instinctively that I should call back the shadowy force I sent away before the meditations.
So I called out to it and told it to return if it wished. That if it was sent from Ahriman, it should reside within my Temple.
I felt a sudden and powerful heat whoosh up behind me. This heat was more intense than the Kundalini I felt earlier, but it was not uncomfortable. Just powerful.
I asked who it was and it replied that it was a Div.
After a few moments passed, I asked for the Div’s name. I got in my way a little and felt some resistance, so I just breathed it’s energy in through my spine and allowed it to flow through my aura more strongly.
And the Div answered … “I am Aighash.”
I know I’ve heard the name while reading the Black Book, but I still can’t remember which Div he is.
We had a simple and cordial conversation. The contents really aren’t anything special, just an introduction.
But he did tell me I should read about him within the Black Book and “come to know me”.
I told him I would.
In my imagination, he appeared as a dark shadowy creature made of pure darkness towering over me from behind. His head featured great wide horns like that of a steer. The impression I got was of a great hulking demonic torso. He had no legs for his waist faded directly into a shadowy cloud of darkness.
I just knew it was his hand that had woken me from sleep.
I felt no fear. I simply recognized his power.
The only notable thing that happened was that he “dismissed” me when the conversation was finished. He said “Go now and return to your world. We will speak again when the time is right.”
Now, I’ve allowed a few close personal spirits tell me something like this before and I would slowly open my eyes and come out of my trance state.
But not this time.
Without any anger or really any emotional reaction at all, I said “No. You do not dismiss me. And I do not dismiss you. For we are one. You are an emanation from within me as I am Angra Mainyu Made Flesh.”
He acknowledged this with a slight nod of his great horned head and said “Farewell. Until we meet again.”
I returned it “Farewell, Aighash. Until we meet again.”
The entire experience felt like it could have lasted an eternity … or at least several hours considering the amount of information that flowed into my mind.
And yet, only 45 minutes passed in this physical world.
