I’m feeling a bit Machiavellian and wanting to play a little game.
Had an interview and it went pretty badly, however what I want to do is influence the panel (I truly, truly hate panels) to think I am actually the best of a bad lot.
What they are looking for is actually a fire-breathing winged unicorn on roller skates with glitter mane and rainbow hooves - that’s to say I mostly matched their job spec but the interview was basically designed to be full of Indiana Jones style challenges and tricks that quite frankly NOBODY will want the bloody job after the interview. Possibly not even the best candidate!
The job itself isn’t bad and would be quite dull for most of the time, however there will be more interesting things to do as well so I would like the option - if anything to dangle individuals over the edge of buildings for using the word “strategic” without understanding the meaning.
I’ve worked with Duke Dantalion before but I’m wondering if there are any other Goetics whom I can call upon to deal with several people at once to influence in my favour.
In truth I’ve got this far getting the job re-advertised and an interview, now I want a bit of payback for their antics and general WTF interrogation techniques and thinking that everyone who talks “managementese” is somehow gifted and blessed when the reality is that combining random words such as benefit, strategic, realisation, cost based analysis in 28 out of 30 questions does not a good interview make. They really must stop reading Dogbert’s guide to Management by Scott Adams - which is where I suspect this rancid selection of drivelling bollocks emanated, let alone quoting it as gospel.
Yes, I counted 28 strategics in 30 questions. I think payback is in order.
Oh yes.
I am the Prince.
So any ideas on mass influence after the event esteemed magi? Nothing fluffy, or ridiculously complex please - I’m happiest working with Dukante and Goetic.
I had a panel interview the other day. Belial was on my left and Bune on my right for it. I delegated Belial to influence their minds and the inner workings of the organization and because he has better influence on the minds of women. I thought all the interviewers were female Ashley turned out to be a guy LOL. He didn’t seemed swayed by me at all. He kept countering me with deeper questions compared with the other panelists that smiled and laughed at all my jokes.But it ended up being three against one in the end.
Bune was emotional influence and support for me as always a calming presence.
For practical advice:
Make eye contact with the person asking the question but address the whole group when you answer.
Find out the names and positions for each interviewer if you can. Try to look them up on social media to find their hobbies, interests, alma maters etc. You can fit these into conversation and pretend like its coincidence.
Send thank you notes. It will help them remember you and make you stand out from other applicants.
yes making eye contact is great when you are on one side and they are all on the other but not so good when two are on your side and two on the other. One just stared me out - I rather got the impression he was thinking about sex or food or having a poo or bunnies… He looked vacant.
there was NO conversation - it was an interrogation! It was bloody hilarious.
I will remember to scent them with rose petals and hand decorate them too - one letter to the decision maker - a swift thank you but no thanks after speaking with the great Goetics.
Thank you.
Thank you all.
Incidentally can Belial fuck up someone else’s career for them - I know one of the unholy assemblage may be applying for a role beyond their capabilities and I want them to doubt their own abilities.
Belial or King Paimon would be good if you want a wrench thrown in someone’s career.
There was one job I worked at where Belial would cause misfortune to coworkers I didn’t like. There was one who got a promotion I applied for and rubbed everyones nose in it acting high and mighty. So he made her car break down so she had to take the bus with the rest of us and it humbled her. He confused some so they would be late (we would get bonuses for how on time we were) and id rise up leader board for being on time. He offered to get more serious but I didn’t want to hurt anyone that didn’t personal harm.
The interview is OVER it has passed - there is nothing I can do now other than wait or expect others to mess up worse than me. I was over tired from researching, creating a presentation that I eventually couldn’t show because THEIR equipment wasn’t operational (I’d brought my own system but it was too small but had printouts), and just gave up due to the atmosphere.
Seriously, I know I was pretty dreadful but I don’t think they made that great an impression on me either - imagine if I’d have been the elusive unicorn they wanted and I was put off - what a waste of recruitment costs… I think that’s the point I want to make really.
I know I can do the job, I might not be perfect but I am willing to put up with their imperfections as well though thinking about it they’ve done very little to convince me. I sort of want an offer so I can say no, but I don’t want them to have the pleasure of rejecting me if that makes sense so I want to get in first - I want them to feel that they have lost an opportunity and to learn something from it.
I want them to learn that the whole reason for re-advertising is that it’s their process and what they are looking for that is wrong and that believe it or not there is NOT an infinite pool of highly skilled talent in that field who’d work for what they are offering and who are available immediately.
Yes, King Paimon can manipulate situations according to the will of the magician.
You don’t want them to have the option to reject you… you want the job, and to have the choice to reject it if you don’t…
Im definitely sure king Paimon would be willing to help you. Just… Believe. They will understand they need you in their company not the other way around
